Oppo mods have no love for Magic Beef Cruiser GT...

Got unshared :( Yall might remember this guy from a few months back. He was being super absurd and claiming he had a Corvette sedan. Anyway, this post is worth a read. Super funny. Oh, and also, I drive a Citroën SM. People don’t seem to understand that even though my truck has four doors, a V8, and was made in Kansas City, it’s still an SM. People are so narrow-minded.

The Eternal Disbelief Surrounding My Beef Cruiser

All I can say is, he was absolutely fascinated with his own car, which was, underwhelmingly, a mid-2000's Accord coupe. Not a bad car, sure, but not great. It was probably partially due to his mild Asperger's, or perhaps some sort of Honda fanboyism that only came out when discussing his own car, and that was the extent of it. We spent a week in Worcester, during which we sang Beatles songs, ate hot (too hot for me at the time, though I grew to like them) buffalo wings, and discussed our favorite cars. And when I told him I was going to buy myself a Beef Cruiser some day, he looked at me in disbelief.

This is the same sort of disbelief—sometimes honest, sometimes mocking—that I encounter every time I tell someone about my Magic Beef Cruiser (the nickname I've given to my Beef Cruiser). They don't believe me. They don't believe me when I tell them it's a sedan and a Corvette—they say it isn't possible. They look at the badge and say "That's not a Corvette, it doesn't have the official Corvette badge on it", and refuse to believe that, simply because it's not made by Chevrolet and has four doors, it is still able to be a 'Vette. "It's not possible," they say. I just smile at them from the driver's seat, blasting a little "Royksopp" and smoking my Blu nicotine-free e-cig, and marvel in the fact that my car's sheer existence is proving them wrong.

At first this troubled me. It made me feel a little off-kilter, and it frustrated me beyond words when people wouldn't understand.

Then, as time went on, I felt... relieved. Magical, almost. It's a concept that most people are seemingly incapable of comprehending—yes, it's a Mitsubishi, yes, it's a Corvette, yes, it has four doors, and no, it's not technically any of those things as we tend to think of them generally, since it's a Beef Cruiser and neither Mitsubishi nor Chevrolet make those, at least, not as such. But nonetheless, I know what my car is, and I'm not about to let anyone trample on my beliefs just because of a little misunderstanding. I'm proud. I feel the magic and I know what I mean when I feel what I say to people who stumble over verbs and pronouns as they drive away in their Civics and Prions just for a few bucks a day.

It's my Magic Beef Cruiser GT. I put it in my username because I know what I'm talking about. And that's the end of the line.